As 2022 came to a close, I reflected on how this work is all about connections. I connect with people who need support as they deal with loss. Connecting with and to clients who need a safe space to process their need for the resources necessary to create a meaningful plan, one that will honour their loved one. 

Moments in our day-to-day life may move us to remember a connection with someone. Such was the case for a young man in his early 30s. He was in the office looking after the final care his dad required. This wasn’t his first time here. He had also looked after his mother’s death care, just one year earlier. 

CKUA Radio is always on in the shop. CKUA is public radio in Alberta. They truly understand the power of the legacy market and they just have all round great music. But, I digress… While we were meeting, a Bahamas tune (Everything to Everyone) began to play in the background. The young man paused for a moment and then made a comment that he was surprised to hear it, in this space, a little funeral home. He said this tune was his current favourite. I replied that I hoped it brought him comfort. 

Two weeks later, this young man returned. He came to pick up paperwork and his dad’s ashes. We chatted about publishing an obituary and decided to review his mom’s paperwork from the year before, to see what we completed then. As the file was retrieved, I noticed he was looking at me with big eyes… The tune on my CKUA was Bruce Springstein’s Dancing in the Dark. He looked at me and said this was his mother’s favourite song.

Together, he and her had processed lots of life listening to Bruce Stpringstein and the E-Street band. 

Well, my heart sure grew in this moment. It became a little awkward for the two of us and he needed to get outside, quickly. Off he went. I texted him that night, as a check in. He said he had experienced quite a profound grief moment. He was OK, now. It had been the first time since she died a year ago that he had felt a connection to her. 

I felt privileged to witness the young man experience this. These connections rely on chance and lifetimes of memories. I can’t plan these types of connections, but I can help connect my clients to information and resources that will help them navigate through difficult times.

As we move into 2023, these are the top three ways I would like to foster connections and be a resource for you this year:

1. Connecting clients to death care providers - Helping to connect you with the people who can help make end of life care and celebration of life planning easier to cope with. These include death doulas, celebrants, musicians, event planners and more. A list of some of the service providers I recommend is available here.

2. Starting the conversation - Helping you and your important people have conversations around death, dying, palliative care and grief.

3. Offering death education - Where are you getting the information you need to choose the best path for you and your loved ones?  All funeral providers provide a planning tool. My Final Care Plans workbook helps you to prepare your departure with empathy and grace. Doing it yourself means you know it’s done your way. Whether a one hour lunch ‘n’ learn or a solid day of workshop learning, watch for upcoming dates. 

With a clearer focus on these areas in 2023, I look forward to bringing empowerment to you and your circles as we manage palliative care, honour loved ones and experience loss, together. In this way, I can provide comfort, clarity and direction in the most challenging times. Please accept my best wishes for a peaceful and gentle 2023.